Yeah, I have no will power. What can I say? The good thing is a free day now is less food and less junk than how we used to eat all the frigging time before.
Holy shit I want something sugary. REAL BAD. Cinnamon rolls, marshmallow squares, Halloween Kisses, lemon cupcakes, peppermint patties, sour candy……. I don’t even think I care what it is, as long as one of the main ingredients is sugar. I’m trying to resist, but damn it’s HARD. (Mmmmm hard candy would be tasty.) I’m about two weeks into giving up junk food and anything with refined sugar in it. I’m also not having anything sweetened with honey, agave or cane sugar. Which means pretty much no sugar at all. I’m feeling a bit under the weather also, which is usually a trigger for junky comfort food. So I’m fighting that battle also. I”m trying really hard not to give in.
I get my parrot food at the bulk barn because it’s pretty cheap, Deci likes it and I can get as much or as little as I want. The problem is, there is a shit load of yumminess at the Bulk Barn. Especially this time of year. Usually when I go in for Deci’s food I slip into the whole “I’ll just get a few small bags of candy. Nothing too big.” mentality. Then I load up. It actually got to the point where I was going in for parrot food at least twice a week so I could get my candy fix. Pretty sneaky of me, eh?
Well, I went in the other night for parrot food. And all I came out with was parrot food. This is a HUGE step for me. Did I want to get Halloween kisses and sour jelly beans? Hell yeah. But I didn’t.
So suck it Bulk Barn. This time I win.
I had to climb four flights of stairs today. It just about KILLED me. I mean, seriously. There was was huffing and puffing and coughing and sweating and sore legs. FOUR FUCKING FLIGHTS. That’s how out of shape I am. But I’m hoping that’ll change. I am on my way to a new-to-me exercise class that’s part of a six week fitness/healthy life/get less fat challenge I’m taking. I think the competition and also support system will help me actually stick to an exercise regime. Because even when I was somewhat skinny in my teens I was never fit. Skinny and healthy? They don’t always go hand in hand.
Ok, so I did some working out last night and alternated from my p90x workout that got me to 218 last time I was serious about working out and losing weight.
First video that caught my attention was this guy… in 5 minutes he had my arms burning. this set is now part of my regime for sure.
I did another 15 minute circuit but the vid I had linked doesn’t bring the right video up here so I cant show it.
Once again trying to detox from the sugar addiction. Five days in and my head is pounding and I am about three steps beyond bitchy. I seriously wish there was a way to bottle this shitty feeling so that the next time I think “Hey, I’ll just have a cupcake or six” I could uncork the bottle and remember what detoxing from sugar and carbs feels like.
I also have my fingers crossed that this detox is the time that the cravings go away. I’ve heard from other people who have cut sugar and most carbs from their diets and after the first week or so they never crave it again. They are completely satisfied with the natural sugar they get from fruit and they ADORE super dark chocolate. They snack on meat. Christ. Not me. This is my fifth or sixth time detoxing and I never loose the desire for sweets. I was once sugar free for two months. Never experience the wonderful high of eating low-carb, the increased energy, better sleep. Nope, I was ready to fucking kill. All the time. Candy, chocolate, cupcakes, pie, cake, ice cream was pretty much all I thought about.
So here’s to hoping this time is different
I licked a roll this morning. Yeah, I did. Remember that spaghetti dinner I was telling you guys about? Well, there were a lot of rolls left over. I have ducks. So I took home some rolls for them. This morning when I woke up and went to let the duckers out in the yard for the day, I brought them down some rolls. Some crusty on the outside, soft and gooshy on the inside rolls.
So, yeah, I licked one. Fuck, at least I didn’t eat it.